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Billy Bob Teeth

Posted by on December 8, 2007 2 Comments

We went Christmas Tree Hunting Yesterday! It was so fun. Coco came with us too. It was her fist time Tree Hunting. I might add it was the perfect day for a first hunt. It snowed alot this week and then is warmed up just enough for us not to freeze. Coco found her tree first, then me and lastly after hiking down the side of a mountain…my mom found a suitable tree for her living room. We joke that mom can never find a tree next to the road, but technically she found our tree and let us have it. Then she wandered off and yelled at us from way down a hill. I proceeded to fall not once, but twice on our way down the hill. AND I was carrying a saw. My elbow is a bit sore today. We all got great trees.

I finished decorating mine last night. Its not a hugely branched tree. It’s not “well-en-bough-ed”. So I couldn’t put up as many ornaments as I wanted to. I bought some of those cheap metal hook things cause I hate it when the string on an ornament it too short and you have to fight it to put it on the tree. Our Lights look a fair bit faded this year. I was going to buy new ones today, but I decided it best to save the money and get some during the after Christmas sales. Plus I couldn’t wait any longer to decorate.

One of my favorite Christmas traditions is Christmas Crackers. Right before dinner everyone crosses their arms and holds a Christmas Cracker (not edible) with the person next to them. On 3 we pull them and the cracker goes bang, or sometimes it doesn’t. haha. Then inside of the cracker there are lots of different little things. There is always a hat! Usually several of the people in my family have to adjust theirs due to oversized-head-ism. But we all wear them for the first part of dinner. For sure for pictures. I remember one year when My mom and I made Christmas Crackers. We made them individual for each person. They had a joke and a little prize and all the usual stuff, but 6 people got Billy Bob Teeth. Those funny fake teeth that make you look like a hick. It was so much fun and soo funny to see even my grandpa with Billy Bob Teeth. We put them into the dogs mouth too.

billy bob teeth
Our Billy Bob Teeth Family Resemblance. (hey…there’s my ZED hoodie! And I don’t miss those glasses.)

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Happy Hokey Pokey Day

Posted by on November 25, 2007 2 Comments

On average I say one dumb thing a week. Morgan might disagree, but I’m talking really dumb not mildly dumb. Sometimes it’s just something thoughtless or something inconsiderate without thinking. Mostly its excruciatingly “Dumb Blond” of me. Today’s was a perfect example. At church Emily had been running around and playing with the other kids and I wasn’t even paying attention when she asked to get picked up. About two minutes later I looked over to Roxy and asked this utterly amazing question “Wheres my kid?” The look of horror that crossed Roxy’s face, plus the look of sheer enjoyment joined together with the pointing finger and this phrase “In your arms” added up for an overall special effect. For the most part I’m not easily embarrassed, but on this one I quickly realized there was no “Just kidding” to be had. I was in on the “dumb dumb” hook line and sinker. Sad moment for humanity. Sad moment because it will go down in history. Note: Roxy pretty much always has to be standing there for me to say something dumb. I think its a rule or something.

Emily’s ocean wonders crib hangey thing is dying. She reaches up to adjust it, but the song it’s singing is going out of tune. Reminds me of a certain Walkman incident in a canoe not to many moons ago. That’s right I said it. Walkman! It’s hard to even describe the sound of batteries dying and a barenaked ladies song playing slower and slower until it finally stops. If you never had a Walkman you missed out on a good many humorous events. I’m going to have to remember to get batteries for the tiny ocean for Em.

I decorated for Christmas!!! I couldn’t handle it anymore. between our Christmas movie fest and the Christmas music I needed to decorate pronto! It was weird to decorate this year with the notion that Emily could reach pretty much anything under 4 feet. I ended up decorating my bathroom and my kitchen more instead. I hung stuff up in the living room though. I did most of it while Emily was having a nap. The fist thing she said when she got up was “OOO Pretty…mine…I hold it….have it…pretty…..mine have it” It was really cute. I have a couple of Christmas bears that I put at her level and a nativity puzzle my Gramma sent that she loves.

Ive been working on a collection of Christmas ornaments that I call my bathroom band. I’m up to six of them already. Every year I look for different ornaments that have instruments with them. It’s cute. They ended up the bathroom band because I ran out of counter space to put them so now they are happy while I brush my teeth. It’s surprisingly hard to find little animals or people that are all Christmas-ey with instruments. My favorite is a moose with a drum and you can put a candle in the drum. Kinda nerdy, but I love Christmas I cant help it. I’m sad that people cant say Merry Christmas anymore. Im going to keep saying it even if nobody else does. Seasons greetings sounds silly. And Happy holidays is supposed to go with Merry Christmas. If you don’t celebrate it then don’t celebrate it. I just don’t think I should have to change my holiday because someone else doesn’t like it. If you celebrate “Happy Hokey Pokey day” then celebrate that, but leave Christmas alone. oops I ranted…Merry Christmas! Happy Hokey Pokey Day!

hokeypokey

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Happy b-day Roxstanley!

Posted by on November 9, 2007 Leave a Comment

Our old computer is fixed!!!Yay. We ordered a mother board off Ebay and the little sucker did the trick. Plus the memory we ordered for our computer works too, so now we have a way faster computer. It will probably mostly be my computer for school. I thought we lost alot of pictures too, but because it works again we only lost maybe 1 folder of pics. So Im super excited about that. AND Morgan and I don’t have to share computer time. Not the end of the world, but nice all the same. It’s good for 2 nerds 2 have 2 computers.

I’ve become addicted to POM Tea. I love it. Its quite light and refreshing. Its got loads of antioxidants in it too so it’s good for you. AND it’s only 60 calories, which is pretty good for juice. I save the glasses for Georgia because we have way too many cups already. I am currently sip sip sipping away while blogging twice in one day. Hooray for inspiration.

It was Roxy’s Birthday yesterday. Emily says “happy birthday you auntie roxy!” Its cute. She’s singing the song alot. We played a bit of a joke on my sister. We wanted to get her a new cell phone, but we couldn’t just get one because of th plan she is already on. so we made gift certificates for her. But instead of giving her those we gave her my old phone in it’s box. All the manuals we still wrapped in plastic and the cords were wrapped up all nice. We only used it for a couple months because it was so crappy. The reception sucked and it would echo while you talked. Basically she thought we had got her a new phone that was a piece of junk. It was really funny. she was like “Ohhh a phone!” She tried really hard to be excited about it, but we all ended up laughing at her. Way to be grateful for junk Roxy! Happy Birthday dude. Way to not be a teenager anymore! You’re doing great!

POM

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Trucker Court

Posted by on September 18, 2007 6 Comments

My week has been crazy. I find it hardest to find time to blog when Morgan works Afternoons. It should be easiest, but somehow it never is. I guess I just get busier on nights when Morgan is at work. I stay up later too because I always want to see him after he gets off work. This week should be better because Morgan is on Days! YAY! I love this shift compared to afternoons. MK’s shift regular shift goes back on in two weeks. I’m so excited for that. He doesn’t miss so much and Emily gets her daddy home all day!

We did it! Coco and I beat Lego Star Wars. NERDY I know, but its super awesome. There are still tons of secret things to find and stuff to do, but I loved it.

Nerdier still…I won my reading contest! I’m not sure how many people were in it. I think I’d feel awful silly if it was just me. Weirder things have happened before. I don’t know what I won yet, but I get to find out on the weekend. Yay! I am so nerdy, yet cool. haha.I want to know the total of the books I read. The contest was by pages though so no loop holes there. Couldn’t just read 100 kids books. I’m not sure why my mind works that way, but it does. Human nature I suppose.

K. Now to tell you about my grand adventure! It all started on a rainy Sunday morning. Last Sunday morning to be precise. I woke up with a lovely sinus cold and a cranky baby. Hold on!! you need to be picturing one of those old black and white movies with the detective in the office and the sweet trench coat and Indiana Jones hat. Ok. You tracking with me..

Where was I… ok. While hurriedly getting ready for church I got Morgan to get me a sinus pill from the Medicine Mirror.I took the handed pill and downed it in one fowl (foul) swoop(who makes these sayings??).By the time I got to church I noticed my head was feeling pretty fuzzy. I was having a hard time focusing on playing the drums. When the worship was over I went and sat down.

That was when it hit me! Pseudoephedrine!!!!! Morgan gave me one of his sinus pills. not mine. I’m allergic to Pseudoephedrine. It makes my brain all fuzzy and I cant think. If I take it at night I don’t sleep. Grrr.This just sets the tone for the rest of my day. Having to let the big P wears off, I felt dozy and fuzzy headed all day. We had a nice afternoon with friends and a relaxing evening. Whats so bad about that you say?

At precisely 8:36 pm we get a collect call from a damsel in distress. She’ll kill me for saying that, just so you know what happens if I never blog again. My friends car broke down in Lytton. A.K.A Middle of nowhere with a gas station. Names have been changed to protect the innocent. We’ll just call her Elisha. She’ll kill me for saying that, just so you know what happens if I never blog again.haha. By about 9:30, when all the Dtails were figured out, I headed out on my grand adventure.

Having planned on going to bed when I put Emily to bed, I was in need of caffeine! For the most part the drive was uneventful, but foggy and with low visibility. My Jetta cruises. I love that it has spunk. Instead of the Jet I would have named her Zippy, but its not cool to double name after dead vehicles. I realize sometimes I get going a little fast, so I looked down at my speedometer to check my speed for a millisecond and thats when it hit me!

Or just missed me. The hugest bear I’d ever seen! Come on I’m in a Volkswagen. All bears are big to VW’s. I missed hitting Winny the Pooh by about a foot. Once my heart stopped leaping around the car and I’d thanked Jesus multiple times, I decided to stop in Cache Creek and go pee. I didn’t think I could handle another scare like that and not just pee my pants. Picked up a couple of munchies at the gas station and stood in a lineup to pay. When I got up to the girl at the cache register I noticed something very peculiar about her. Her mullet looked like it wore her, not the other way around! Freaky!

Here is what she said to me.”Hi, Are you a female trucker?”. I was like “Um no”. I started looking at my clothes for stains or at my pile of junk food for tell tale trucker food. Nothing…I couldn’t figure it out. I was not looking stereotypically trucker-ey. It was weird. Then I said “My friends car broke down and I’m going to rescue her. AAANND I almost hit a bear.” Mullet Girl was like” Wow you just made my night! Awesome!”. Glad I made someones night.

Carried on through to Lytton. Picked up a random stranded girl I knew whose car broke down and headed home.

Monday was particularly Anticlimactic after a day like Sunday. Except that I made an Apple pie Pizza and that was a good Idea!

Bear
I think the bear looked like this.

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The Saga Continues.

Posted by on September 12, 2007 2 Comments

This week and poop…honestly. Gross.

I’m shopping at Save-on yes(TURD)ay when I start to notice this awful smell. It seems to be following me around. I’ve noticed that before if you cross aisles with someone on the same aisle pace as you through the store, but today was different. This awful smell was coming from my child. She had waited all day until we were away from home without a diaper bag to do her business. We hurried to get the essentials and got in line at the check out.

Thats when I noticed it. The chunky. AHHHH. We were having a full on blowout in the grocery store. What do I do, what do I do??? So I pulled her shirt down over the doody until we got to the truck. It would have been easier if the check out girl had noticed my antsy frustration and gone a little faster. She was so slow. “Do you want to redeem points today”?AHHH. I look over to the film counter and wonder about the Film girl’s expression. Oh no! She noticed the doody. Ahhh.Thank You Taryn for laughing at me!! It had to be someone I knew didn’t it. grr.

After almost forgetting to pay because I was in such a hurry, I made it to the car. I pop the trunk and the hallelujah chorus plays. My hiking baby backpack is in the trunk with a couple of diapers and wipes in it. I don’t exactly know how I got Em undressed and changed in the parking lot, I think I’ve blacked big portions of it from my memory. All I know is that as we were driving away Emily tried her new words and sentences out. “Nasty poopy bum, bum gross, nasty nasty nasty!”

There is now a boycott in place. As long as Morgan is at home I will not be changing 1 diaper for the next 3 days. NOT 1! I think I could have held out for more, but 3 days seems good for now.

SIDE NOTE: I didn’t write this to gross anyone out, I just needed to capture the moment so when Emily is being all mouthy and age 9 and not into cleaning her room she can have a seat at the WordPress archive and gain a little perspective.

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Emily and the Winner

Posted by on August 14, 2007 1 Comment

Sooo tired. Caaan’t sleep. grr. I should be napping right now while Emily is sleeping, but I cant. I just stared at my ceiling for a while then gave up. We went to a friends house for a campfire last night and stayed up too late, but that was ok. Then when I got home I couldn’t fall asleep. I think I dozed off at like 4:30 or something. At least the campfire was super relaxing. The last couple of weeks have been go go go go, so it was nice to just chill out and enjoy the night. Yay hooray for being able to get a babysitter last minute.

So I go in to wake Emily up this morning because she is going to go with me to staff meeting. Bye the time I got there she was already awake. Standing there in her crib with NO clothes on. Diaper gonzo! not good not good! panic! This is gonna be gross. I guess this was just a warning for next time. No messes to clean up. YAY! She must have only taken the diapey off in the few minutes before I got her or we would have had issues. I thought she had managed to get all her clothes off, but I guess the sitter put her down in just a diaper cause there wasn’t a sleeper to be found. Whew. Takes me back. Apparently my parents called me Houdini baby and had to pin my sleepers on backwards to keep me in them. Please no baby finger painting! NOOOO!

We went to the garlic festival on the weekend. It was pretty fun. Morgan cached in one of his triple dog dares to get me to eat a spicy clove of garlic. It was ok at first cause I like garlic, but after a sec my mouth was on fire!!!! Then I didn’t feel so good. My stomach was like “You jerk!”. so We went to another concession and got some delicious ribbettes and a big bottle of water for me to down. I think I probably still smell like garlic 2 days later. healthy though. I tried a garlic Jelly Bean. It was good. Maybe not my snack of choice, but good none the less.

We took Emily to see the Llamas. LLAMA FACE!!(sorry couldn’t help myself – Emperors new groove – See it!) She loves them. There was this “winner” standing out side the petting cage smoking with serious 80′s Ray bans. I was talking to the petting zoo guy about the pictures they offer. I said “could she get her picture taken with a sheep or something”. About then the “winner” pipes up.”Thats a llama!”. I was like “um duh. I meant the sheep over there. The one that looks like a sheep”. Ok I didn’t say that, but I wanted too. I wanted to be like”Actually it’s an alpaca, Mr. Winner”.

He then gets his little girl who is about 4 or 5 to come out and they walk away with him blowing smoke all around her. I cant really handle that. They know stuff now that they didn’t years ago. Nobody thought second hand smoke was bad before, but it IS! I so wanted to be like “Um Mr. Winner. Your damaging your daughters lungs and I hope she sues you when she gets older!”. Sorry. I just get frustrated by people whose habits effect kids. Its dumb. It should be considered child abuse to smoke in your car with the windows up and kids or babies in the car. It would be if you put any other kind of smoke or gas in there for them to breathe. Done ranting. Sorry

Heres a couple of pictures of Em and the Alpaca/sheep/llama/elephant.

llama
Melissa and Holly with Me and Emmy.
Holly2
Emily and Holly.

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Conspiracy Theory

Posted by on July 30, 2007 Leave a Comment

Something I thought was funny in school. My imagination isnt normal. Seriously

  1. That crappy stuff thats called tofu isn’t tofu its a recycled vomit compound that airlines sell to the grocery story for extra money to fuel there planes.
  2. The reason that every thing tastes like chicken is because it is chicken.The manufacturers found a cheap way to mass produce chickens and change their molecular structure to look like many other products, but even when the products structure had been changed the taste still lingers.The other companies couldn’t afford to bring in the real thing because chicken was cheaper.
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AZEWS

Posted by on July 30, 2007 1 Comment

 

Hey, Thought I’d post this today. Just a shweet recollection of what we thought in high school AND my bestest buddy Leah wrote it. Check her page and see if there is anything different about her now.haha. I have a couple of new OLD flash files too I might post. Just so you can laugh at me.

Azews Fashion Files

Okay…you wanna look cool…just like Courtenay and I do. You have to start by getting rid of all those thoughts of looking sexy and being “in style”!! more people respect people who are original in their clothing. More guys think chicks, who have enough courage to wear somthing that the girl likes instead of what the world likes, are much cooler and have better personality…well any of the cool guys do. Tight pants and skanky clothes aren’t going to get you a respectable guy anyway. GUYS!! Girls don’t like you to look dirty,personally…I like wife beaters and hoodies….crazy thrift store finds or things that are totally hip. Guys have it easy.

GIRLS

okay…want some advise? You CAN be attractive. If you’re a little overweight don’t wear things that show your stomach. It’s good that youre brave enough to but that’s all that’s good about it. I know some sticks that wont even show their flat stomachs. Azews thinks that chicks with baggy pants, hoodies, ball chains, wife beater style tanks, mega bell bottoms, anything weird from value village, body peircings,and hemp necklaces are all rad. Actually anything that you can think of that doesn’t have anything to do with what all the prissy twinks are wearing. (No offence to you girls who like to wear spandex)I mean I like to dress up once in a while but…I get embarressed when I look like everyone else…it shows I’m not original and I follow….BE YOURSELF GIRLS!!

DO
*Be colorful
*Wear our duct tape stuff
*Be yourself
*Try to smile lots
*Wear somthing flattering to your figure
*Wear TONS of crazy jewlery
*Layer nifty clothes (even dresses with pants)
*Proudly show that you have class and not a big @$$
*Wear somthing that brings out your eyes color
*Dye your hair as funky as you’re comfortable with
*State what you believe in
*Peirce anything you want
*Work out

DONT
*Follow that your friends are wearing (get ideas from them..don’t be them)
*Take my advise if you don’t want to
*Pack on the make up..PLEASE!!
*Wear clothes that are going to give you sexual attention. You want to attract guys that will treat you well. Not ones that are going to use you for sex
*BE AFRAID
*Wear those tight black pants that all the girls are wearing and then put a hoodie on…you’re giving punks a bad name here…please…have mercy!
*Wear those big hoop earrings unless you’re REALLY dressing up…come on lets fight against the 80′s movement!
***Complain that you’re fat…if you think you are, then go get some excersize and eat somthing healthy…goodness…girls get a grip!***

GUYS

You people have it easy, well if you’re trying to attract me anyway. I think a guy who dresses like a punk is really cool but my boyfriend has more of a gangster thing going on. I think that there’s a few things that you can do to make things perfect…it doesn’t matter what style you have though. I personally don’t enjoy the cowboy look but some girls (God bless them) do.

DO
*Wear really baggy pants
*Wear our duct tape stuff
*Wear wife beaters (just don’t beat your wives)
*Work on those abs..mmmmm
*Wear necklaces…lots of them…not gold
*Wear anything silver
*Have crazy spikey or curley hair
*Peirce yourself…nipples are cool…and the bottom of your belly button

DONT
*Wear tight jeans
*Wear short jeans
*Wear short shorts
*Wear tight shorts
*Wear spandex…YUCK
*Gel your hair unless you now what you’re doing (most of you don’t)
*Walk like you are really cool…most likely you’re not…you just think you are

Okay…that about wrappes it up. Actually as dumb as I may sound I do know alot about hair, make up, and fashion. So if you’re a cool cat…or a not so cool cat, you can E-mail me and get some Azews advise on any problem you may have. I do know my stuff so try me. Have fun being you. You only live once…once you’re old a grey you may regret that you never dyed your hair blue. Maybe you’ll be rad enough to dye it when you’re 80…I know I will. Anyway all your questions can go to azews@quackquack.com I’m here for you man. I also provide councel to those of you who are stuck in the 80′s (poofy bangs or mullets) or have been stuck in tight jeans for so long that your legs have fallen off.
All my love,
Leah Thomson

schoolness
Just to show you how cool we were in grade 12.

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L'chyim (Think Yiddish)

Posted by on July 25, 2007 1 Comment

How many funny things can happen in one day? In my world the potential is amazing. I think of hundreds of things to blog about all day long, but then I cant remember them all. I’m tempted to carry a voice recorder and then have dragon naturally speaking transcribe it. Riiight. Since I’m that big of a nerd that’s exactly what I will do. or not do. Here is the lowdown of some of the funny things that happened in the last day.

I got called middle aged. Can someone help me with the knife in my back please.

Emily ate dirt and then…yep you guessed it…pooped dirt.

Emily choked on Timmys and Georgia rescued her.

Then she chucked her very full sippy cup which exploded in Timmys

Emily said the “F” word about a hundred times today trying to say “Walk”.

I cant remember them, but several times Morgan and I had word communication problems, which pretty much means one of us hears something absolutely ridiculous that the other person didn’t say.

Those are just some examples of my typical day. Not even counting our adventures in the supermarket. Again…I need to write a book about the weird things that happen to me. There could be a whole chapter on grocery stores.

I learned some new songs today. I’ve been trying to find some new things to play at youth. I found a bunch of good stuff. I burned L’chyim some stuff to try. I practiced a bunch of the new songs and I really like them. I’ve been playing my guitar so much lately. I love it. I’ve been learning alot and just having alot of fun. I’ve been playing my electric the most. Im turning into the noodle kid. The one that never shuts up. noodle noodle noodle. Its ok tho cause I wear my head phones.

I’m in the middle of a good book, so I’m gonna go read it and stay up late waiting for Morgan to get home again. I hate going to bed when he is still at work. It’s only till midnight tonight tho. So thats nice.

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Heat Wave

Posted by on July 13, 2007 Leave a Comment

It’s to hot to blog.

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